


Coming Home Story Bible

by Thunderbolt5



Series: The Tales of Found Families [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: Agender Character, Angst with a Happy Ending, Aromantic Character, Asexual Character, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Blood and Injury, Child Abuse, Child Neglect, Child Soldiers, Cookies, Crying, Eventual Happy Ending, Evil Twins, Fae & Fairies, Family, Family Bonding, Found Family, Gen, Help, Hollow Soul, How Do I Tag, Hugs, Human Trafficking, I Blame Tumblr, Injury Recovery, Italian Mafia, Loss of Trust, Magic, Magic-Users, Magical Accidents, Manipulation, Married Characters, Memory Loss, Mental Coercion, Minor Character Death, Miscommunication, Misunderstandings, Monsters, Organized Crime, Original Fiction, Original Universe, Past Child Abuse, Plot Twists, Recovered Memories, Royalty, Runes, Science, Slow To Update, Soul Magic, The Author Regrets Everything, The Author Regrets Nothing, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Twins, fairy magic, intrusive narrator, painter, runic magic, theater nerd
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-31
Updated: 2021-02-19
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:34:17
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 4,842
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21800533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thunderbolt5/pseuds/Thunderbolt5
Summary: A catalogue of the characters, specific places, plot, subplots in the Story Coming Home. Set in the Auzilan World, which has its own bible explaining the laws, geography, history, biology, and other world aspects.
Relationships: Aldun & Goodwin, Aldun Cyning/Neila Cyning, Atticus Skinner & Percival Skinner, Connard Bridges/LacheteBridges, Dita Cyning & Susu Cyning, Dr. K B Goodwin/Kate Deagonheart, Goodwin & Lynian & Hardal, Kate & Hardal, Kate & Lynian, Lynian & Hardal Deagonheart, Lynian Deagonheart/Cassandra Deagonheart, Matron & Skinner twins, Matron & the Trainers, Neila & Kate, Rose Parton & Simon Parton, Samara Fell & Kristy Bridges, Samara Fell & Rose Parton, Samara Fell & Simon Parton
Series: The Tales of Found Families [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1963138
Comments: 1
Kudos: 8





	1. Characters - Protagonists

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Protagonist Overviews and Descriptions

_Samara Fell (human female)_

The Central Character of the story.

16, almost 17 years old, Samara goes by Sam with very select people, and Samara the rest of the time. She thinks it's hilarious that her birth parents couldn't decide between "Samantha" and "Sara" and so combined the two. She is a resident at The Matron's Home for Lost Souls, currently the eldest. She is a thoughtful, humorous child with a very strong will and clever words. She cares deeply for others very quickly, but is hesitant to accept care from others. Sam is comfortable in her skin and moves confidently. When she wants, she can fill the room with her presence and make it as if there's nowhere in the room she's not paying attention to. At other times, she can also slip by almost unnoticeable. She is currently the Matron's top student, meaning she gets the most attention and "assignments" from her. Samara is quiet a lot of the time, a good listener, but she absolutely loves to talk when she knows the other person or people are listening. She values patience, tends to make decisions more based on her emotions about the possible outcomes than strictly logic, and is hesitant to trust purely because of what the Matron has done to her. She has a matter-of-fact but quiet voice, but only when she's calm. She expresses emotions very tonally the rest of the time. She likes taking care of people younger than herself, but doesn't particularly care for taking care of herself.

Samara is below average height for her age, but not drastically so. She's pale skinned with a cool undertone. She has brown hair that shows streaks of blonde and red in the sunlight and especially in the summer. It hangs down to the small of her back and is kept in a high ponytail or otherwise pinned back most of the time, slightly wavy. She has gently green eyes with a soft ring of a goldish yellow next to her pupils.

_Cassandra Deagonheart (human female)_

Main Character

27 years old, raised by the Monster Royal Family and remaining in the Queen's personal inner circle into adulthood. She's currently a monster rights ambassador, alongside her husband Lynian. As a teen she volunteered at the Home after what she was told was a gas leak destroyed part of the roof and killed several of the children in the attic. She helped with the repairs and then just stayed to help with the smaller children. She became close with Samara, but when she turned 18, the Matron used her magic to block off anything other than a momentary recall of any of the memories from her time at the Home. Cassandra goes by her full name for official business, but goes by Cass or Cassie at home and with friends/family. She loves humor - puns, funny stories, suggesting terrible ideas for the laugh, bad one liners. She likes baking, even though she's not the best, but hates cooking. She values honesty and standing up for what is right - no matter the personal cost. This last point means that her family often has to step in to make sure she doesn't burn herself out. She's very confident in her worth, and very good at calling people (Goodwin) out on problematic behaviors. A while after Katie and her children left Goodwin because he was terrible to them, she was assigned to work with in Public Relations, and when he started to try and treat her the same way he treated them, she called him out on his Bullshit and taught him how to keep himself accountable for himself _enough _that he agreed to get help. When Katie and her kids came back, Lynian and her hit it off, and got married (one of the first interracial couples in a long time) to him about a year and a half later.

Cassie is a pale skinned woman with a cool undertone, highly freckled, brilliantly blue eyes, and long ginger red hair. Her hair is long enough to sit on and can be seen in braids and buns often. She smiled closed lipped and carries herself with a gentle sort of hesitance that speaks of thinking more than she lets on, but also a quiet assuredness of her position with others and in her life. In the first act, she has a burnt orange scar-like mark below and behind her right ear. She has the kind of face that one might liken to an elf or fairy - high cheekbones, well defined but not harsh jaw, "perfect" eyebrows, etc.

_Susu Cyning (human nonbinary)_

Main Character

13, an Agender child, Susu is sassy and curious, determined to get into things they aren't meant to. They are selectively mute due injury, but can speak if they wish (it's just very uncomfortable). They and Dita were among the Matron's most talented students, until Queen Neila took an interest in them and adopted the two as her wards. They have a tendency to keep problems to themself, even if they are problem they should be keeping from the adults. They are often and almost equally mistaken for a girl or a boy, very ambiguous. They are strong willed and stubborn at times, and can stand their ground against conflict - but chooses not to if they think the outcome isn't worth it. They value safety and stability, and is, maybe too often sometimes, too willing to give other things up or leave others behind to make sure they and Dita are safe and somewhere where the anger can't touch them. They're much more likely to help if they owe someone, or feel like they do. They refused to participate in something the Matron insisted they do, speaking up harshly and loudly to the point that Atticus Skinner (see Antagonists) almost caught them, and so the Matron punished them by damaging their throat so that it's incredibly uncomfortable and sometimes even painful for them to speak. They ran from the Matron, and Martha Coakley (See Protagonists) found them and Dita and took them to the monster-run hospital immediately. It was there that the two kids attracted Queen Neila's attention the first time. They use sign language to communicate most of the time now.

They have pure chocolate brown hair cut into a spikey/wavy short bob and ruby red eyes that have concentric rings (see Boku no hero Present Mic Red Eyes). They have tan skin with a speckling of pale freckles on their cheeks and arms. They tend to wear colorful clothes, varying on feminine and masculine styles depending on the day. They like stripes and carry around sticks, branches, wooden dowels, and other wood-based objects they can mess (with others and other things) with. They don't like eye contact and mostly keep their eyes off to the side - or on the ground/what's in front of them, if they are feeling particularly anxious.

_Dita Cyning (human female)_

Main character

14, also considered one the Matron's more talented, along with Susu and Samara. She is sassy and quick witted - the first to make a quip and the last to get a word in an many arguments or tense situations. She is very protective of her little sibling, and it was her defensiveness yet quietly lonely attitude that attracted Queen Neila's attention. She's tight lipped about herself in fear of driving people away by revealing that she's not a nice person. Nokk and her get along swell. However, she's also a drama queen and is often quite silly and childish (of course - she's a child what do you expect) in her attempts to gain attention from adults. Don't steal her food. If you aren't Susu or she didn't give you permission? Doesn't matter if you're the monster King or the leader of a powerful mafia - she'll rip your head off =D. She can be surprisingly gentle and kind when she wishes to be. She loves roller skating and can embroider pretty well. When Susu was "punished" and were forced into silence, she learned sign language alongside Dita and Samara in order to talk to Susu like normal.

Dita has reddish brownish fluffy hair she keeps in a cut about shoulder length, eyebrow length bangs. she has vividly green eyes, almost piercing. She frowns and glares more often then not, but her genuine smiles are absolutely brilliant. She's shorter than Susu (and hates it). She loves patterns and bold colored clothes, especially greens that can *try* to match the saturation of her eyes.

_Dr. K B Goodwin (monster -skeleton ghost hybrid- male)_

Main character

110s, one of the Royal's Inner Circle. Goodwin goes by his last name with everyone, and wouldn't let anyone know his first two names (Kolton Briggs) if he could help it. He doesn't get rid of them because he likes the sound of "Dr. K B Goodwin" better than "Dr. Goodwin" for when he needs to throw his weight around for things. He's one of the, and perhaps _the_ top scientist when it comes to Runic Magics. He invented the technology for, designed, and built the Geothermal Reactor that powers almost all of Eadon's power. He's pretty gentle and kind with kids, in a way that they can sense. Oftentimes, he's kinda confused about why small children choose to trust him so quickly. He's both an educator and student at heart, and loves to learn and teach others. One of the fastest ways to endear yourself to him is to ask insightful questions about whatever he's working on, or in general. He loves curiosity, cuddling, warm drinks, making fun of terrible b list movies, inventing, tinkering, his wife, his kids, and keeping busy. He's one of the Royal Family's Inner Circle members, as one of the family's trusted doctors and scientists; wielding significant political power when it comes to medical and city power issues. 

When he was young, busy, arrogant, and self-entitling, he was, frankly, pretty abusive of his wife Katianna Deagonheart (See Protagonists). It took his children and her leaving, and Cass forcing him to hold himself accountable for his actions for him to go an abuser's group to break his entitled and hurtful ways. After a number of years, he and Katie got back in touch, he apologized, and they set up a strict set of rules for him that he follows to this day, in order for everyone to help him to keep from backsliding into terrible habits. He's very careful with how he treats people, now, almost hesitant to ask things from people who A) work for him B) work with him C) live with him - in that he's going through a mental checklist to see if asking would be going beyond boundaries or what is respectful. He also keeps a very strict hold of his temper. He's not particularly patient though - just restrained in his responses. A side effect of being a former abuser that's very vigilant about keeping abusive habits out of his life is that he's much more keenly aware of when someone else might have abusive behaviors or mindsets - an "I own you" type attitude. The most known (by others) practice to prevent backsliding is his tendency to ask her what she wants/needs him to do, and he tries to pamper her as well.

He's a Dominate Monster by new blood - meaning that, unlike the Cynings, who have had Dominate powers for generations, his parents were powerful enough monsters that his own magics and strengths add up to put him in the same power class as Heritage Dominates. While his physical appearance is much more skeletal than ghost, his magics are much more ghost-like. See "Chapter 10: Magics, Their Different Rules, and Character Specific Powers", for a specific description of his abilities.

He's a skeleton and ghost hybrid, so he has inherited features from both. His physical appearance leans towards a skeleton, but has several ghostly features. His skull is mostly skeletal, with the exception that his jaw and mouth are more.... fleshy... in that he has lips and cheeks that cover his teeth, the same off white as the rest of his skull. It's not clear where the flesh melts into his skull to become, well, skull. He has a powerful build, standing a head and a half over most people, almost King Aldun's height. He has skeletal hands, and forearms, but most of the rest of his body is usually covered by his lab uniform or long-sleeved clothes. He's not affected by heat and cold for the most part and so wears what he wants when he wants. He likes solid and darker colors, turtle necks, and overly long scarves. He has a crack in his left eye socket, on the outer edge. It starts at the very corner of his eye and splits into three cracks. Two twist upwards near the temple, and one wanders down and behind his jaw, much longer. He rubs at it when he's stressed or tired, as if it aches. It does not impair his sight or ability to move his eye or the surrounding areas.

_ Katianna (Kate) Deagonheart (monster -fairy- female) _

Main Character

90s, Katianna goes by Kate or Dr. Deagonheart at home and work, respectively. The sole parent of Lynian and Hardal (who still address her as "mom" even though they're now adults). She's a nurturing and patient woman, but not one that will allow anyone to walk all over her. 

She is a proud and long-suffering woman. She is a scientist interested in transformative magics more than Runics. She chose to be Goodwin's assistant and moved in with him because they studied together and became close friends. They got married a few years after moving in together, and adopted two abandoned skeleton kids together. However, when Goodwin's behavior and treatment of her degraded, and he hurt her enough to give her Hollow, she grabbed Lynian and Hardal and fled. She stayed out of the spotlight and out of areas that would put her into contact with Goodwin, raising the two boys on her own, and recovering from her Hollow sickness until Cass contacted her. She was very hesitant about the meeting, but her now adult sons and Cass guaranteed that they wouldn't ley Goodwin touch her or talk with her any more than she wanted. It took a few years for Goodwin to earn her trust back, but now that they are back together and stable and healthy, Kate has moved back in with him, and they are considered a power couple by those who see them interact in the privacy of their own home.

_Queen Neila Cyning (monster -Black Elk- female) _

Supporting/side character hybrid

150s, The Queen of the Monster Kingdom and all its domains.

_King Aldun Cyning (monster -Roosevelt Elk- male) _

Supporting/side character hybrid

160s, The King of the Monster Kingdom and all its domains.

_Lynian Deagonheart (monster -skeleton- male) _

Supporting/side Character hybrid

56 years old, 

_ Hardal Deagonheart (monster -skeleton- male) _

Supporting/side Character hybrid

52 years old, 

_ Martha Coakley (human female) _

Side Character

35 years old,

_Kristy Bridges (human female)_

14 years old,

Side Character

_ Nokk (monster -vine-/Soulless male) _

Side Character

??? years old, a small monster made of vines, with a face in one of the bright pink flowers that bud on him, he has no known relatives.

_ Aloe (monster -spider- female) _

Side Character

200s, a bipedal monster with six arms, a wicked, fanged grin. Vera's sister. Runs the bakery half of Aloe & Vera's.

_Vera (monster -spider- female)_

Side Character

200s, a six legged monster with two arms, and glittering lidless eyes. Aloe's sister. Runs the café half of Aloe & Vera's.

_ Simon Parton (human male) _

Side Character

8 years old, older brother of Rose. He is quiet, sensible, and has a surprising seriousness when it comes to discussions with adults. Is continuously amused by his sister and translates her excited mumbled-rambles that she is prone to. He is gentle and sweet, though. He loves drawing and a number of other types of art. 

_ Rose Parton (human female) _

Side Character

6 years old, younger sister of Simon. She is enthusiastic, energetic, and fiercely loving. She clings tightly to everyone she loves, shares what she enjoys with them, 

_ Priscilla Stone (human female) _

Side Character

14 years old,


	2. Characters - Antagonists

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Antagonist Description and Role Overview

_Atticus Skinner (human male)_

Supporting Character

_52_

_ Percival Skinner (human male)_

Supporting Character

_48_

_Magdalena - The Matron (Magical human female)_

Central Antagonist

_55_

_Matron's Ancestor (magical human unknown gender)_

Side character

_unknown age_

_Connard Bridges (human male)_

Side/supporting Character

_45_

_ Lache Bridges (human female)_

Background Character

37


	3. Family Trees

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who's related to who? And in what ways?

**Families:**

_The Cynings_

  * King Aldun Cyning - husband to Neila, legal father of the wards
  * Queen Neila Cyning - Wife to Aldun, legal mother of the wards
  * Dita Cyning - Older sister to Susu, legal child of the King and Queen
  * Susu Cyning - Younger sibling to Dita, legal child of the Queen

_The Deagonhearts and Goodwins_

  * Dr. K B Goodwin - husband to Katianna, adoptive father of Lynian (Heinz) and Hardal, father-in-law of Cassandra
  * Katianna Deagonheart - wife to Goodwin, adoptive mother of Heinz and Hardal, mother-in-law of Cassandra
  * Lynian (Heinz) Deagonheart - Adoptive son of Goodwin and Kate, older brother to Hardal, wife of Cassandra
  * Hardal Deagonheart - Adoptive son of Goodwin and Kate, younger brother of Heinz, and brother-in-law of Cassandra
  * Cassandra Deagonheart - In-law of Goodwin, Kate, Heinz, and Hardal.

_Bridges_

  * Connard Bridges - Father of Kristy, ex husband of Lache
  * Lache Bridges - Mother of Kristy, ex wife of Connard
  * Kristy Bridges - Daughter of Connard and Lache

_Skinners_

  * Atticus Skinner - Older brother of Percy
  * Percival Skinner - Younger brother of Atty

_Partons_

  * Rose Parton - Younger sister of Simon
  * Simon Parton - Older brother of Rose

**Non-Familial Relations:**

_Friends_

  * Atticus and Percival Skinner - Close friends of The Matron
  * Samara - Friends with Rose and Simon Parton, Cassandra, and Kristy.

_Colleagues_

  * King and Queen Cyning - Work with the Inner Circle (comprised of Monsters of high social or political status) to rule their people.
  * Skinner Twins - Connard Bridge's employers, Matron's customers (She provides them with specifically trained peoples)
  * Goodwin - His Assistants. They carry out his plans and orders on big projects where he cannot feasibly do the work by himself
  * Matron - The Trainers. Under her direction, the Trainers teach the children of the Home the skills she wants them to. They are on her payroll.


	4. Places

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Places, organized by time introduced, followed by a classification where the scenes and chapters that need places is established for reference in Chapter 6's Plot Overview.

The settings will be used during the course of the story, ordered by time of introduction, and labelled to indicate the chapters and scenes they will be in. Basic description only, in depth descriptions can be found in the Auzilan World Bible.


	5. Subplot Planning

Each arc/subplot (SP) will be marked with one of five purposes

  1. Character development
  2. Narration or (hopefully) subtle worldbuilding for narration purposes
  3. Pacing adjustment
  4. Necessary setup for later events
  5. Building Character Dynamics

And then other appropriate information will be given, and finally how tied into the main plot each SP is.

The Order they are written is the order they come to their individual climaxes, and each has a label for reference in Ch6 (first label is bolded)

**ASP**) Heinz and Cass relationship

  * Building Character Dynamics, Worldbuilding, Necessary Setup
  * Newly weds, and so still learning about each other and what it means to be life partners
  * Arguments™ and how the couple resolves them
  * Is the First SP to "finish", but the SP is just what needs to be seen for later plot purposes and shows that they are a healthy, strong couple who will support each other for the rest of the story
  * A few arguments, especially about Samara (kept from her) 
  * Relationship dynamics and how they help each other and compromise everyday for each other
  * Aftereffects of this SP are a constant presence in the Story, but not driving in any way

BSP) Kate and Goodwin's marriage repair after effects, the actual events shown in a prequel/sequel

  * Building Character dynamics, Pacing, Slight Necessary setup
  * Goodwin was previously abusive, and Kate left him for that
  * Cass helped him fix the problem enough for her to feel comfortable returning
  * He still works everyday to make sure he doesn't slip back into previously broken abusive habits, and they constantly communicate about whether Kate feels her respect or equality being threatened
  * They take regular breaks that Kate usually determines, to check if they are still equal in the relationship
  * Again, the relationship doesn't end, the SP is to establish they are a power couple that can call both call bullshit on abusive situations better than many people
  * Both love each other with their whole Souls, and neither wants to lose the other, now
  * intended to leave more questions then it answers, to set up a prequel/sequel
  * Aftereffects of this SP are a subtle but not driving force of the main plot, heavily tied in

CSP) Goodwin Continuing his career, making discoveries

  * Worldbuilding, Mainly Necessary setup, Building Character dynamics
  * Establishes Goodwin's career so far, and his expertise in old magics
  * An experiment Samara is present for presents what the extent of Goodwin's, Kate's, and Aldun's magical powers. 
  * Samara asks about Neila's powers later, and this defines hers
  * Goodwin's explanation of what he is doing helps define the magic system in the world at large
  * tied into the main plot, mostly through aftereffects of the SP

DSP) Kristy's character arc how she escapes her father

  * Character development, Pacing
  * Kristy's abusive father gets worse, and Kate recognizes this (BSP)
  * sets up ESP to begin climaxing in the final act
  * a bit of a rest from the main plot before the final act kicks in
  * defines the legal/social powers that the Skinner twins have
  * legal power being with bought police and blackmailed officials in Town Hall
  * weakly tied to the main plot, not necessary but strongly wanted by the author

ESP) Establishing Skinner twin moralities and Matron's breaking of their moral dealings

  * Character development, Necessary Setup For Later Important™ events, Building Character dynamics, Pacing Adjustment
  * Explains enough of the Skinner twins and the Matron's pasts that their past (DSP) and future actions in the story will (very very hopefully) be consistent
  * Defines the twins' relationship with the Matron and how she is betraying that
  * Strongly tied into the main plot

FSP) Priscilla character arc

  * Character development, Narration
  * Priscilla's learning abut the real purpose of the Home and what the Matron really is humbles and forces Priscilla to grow in order to survive and get out
  * Her arc ends with her leaving the Home for good
  * dependent on the main plot to occur, but not necessary

GSP) Martha character arc

  * Character development, Necessary setup
  * Very similar to FSP, except that instead of humbling her, it forces Coakley to grow enough of a spine to stand up to the Matron, even if only secretly
  * this is necessary because it gives Samara that ally she needs when the rest have been manipulated into abandoning her
  * Gives the rest of the children in the Home an ally to get out by the end of the story
  * dependent on the main plot to occur

HSP) Breaking Samara

  * Character development, Necessary Setup
  * The Matron makes "perfect products" by, in the more defiant or socially supported children, breaking their will to escape or snitch
  * This is what the Matron's tried to do from the beginning of the story, and sets up Samara's willingness to sacrifice herself for the family she had tried to scrap together before the Matron dragged her back
  * catalyst for ISP and the climax
  * Heavily tied in with the main Plot

ISP) Nokk's growth from snitching bastard who "belongs to no one" to a snitching Bastard who figured out what the hell loyalty and owing people means. (not much growth here to be honest)

  * Character development, Necessary setup
  * this arc and "growth" is more just Nokk learning that doing things for people doesn't mean he "belongs" to them.
  * Necessary because this is how Heinz and Cass learn they have been manipulated into abandoning a child into a world where she will be sold into black market slavery, but with a prettier name
  * Allows the protagonists a way to get into the Home and create a correspondence with Martha about helping Samara and taking the Matron down
  * Significantly tied in with the main plot

JSP) Bates

  * Narration
  * Bates writes philosophical articles for the official Eadon newspaper
  * Bates finally gets his chance to publish more than a small time theoretical article when Heinz drops off the scoop on the Matron to kill her socially
  * Bates gets promoted
  * not very attached to the main plot


	6. The Unexplored and Story Ttidbits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Character histories or stories unexplored during the story, tidbits about the characters, other subplot ideas, and other things I can't fit into the main story.

Extra or discarded characters

  * The Old Secretary (scrapped for Martha)
  * Unnamed Skinner character (split into Atticus and Percival)

Characters I didn't get to explore (side/background)

  * Mallory Das Sutton - One of the Matron's students sold at the beginning of the story
  * Aloe's Date - Unnamed male that calms the more nervous human customers in the sisters' shops.
  * Crackle - The bartender at Crackle's, also the owner
  * Crackle's staff - The cooks and waitstaff at Crackle's

Story Tidbits

  * this will be added onto as the story progresses


	7. Plot Overview SPOILERS OF ALL SPOILERS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An overview of the Plot, character/location/subplot introductions and planning. IF you stick around long enough to read the actual story this is the chapter to avoid, as there will be nothing hidden - no plot twist or character deaths or surprise backstory reveals.

Lol imma do this chapter later it'll be a doozy tho


	8. Chapter titles and other shenanigans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter title are fun. Story titles less so.  
Should I name the Acts?

Wait a minute.. Who _are_ You?

Percival Skinner

No.

Paperwork is stressful

Heinz Deagonheart

Oh No.™

Oh Yes.™

_ Please _ don’t explode

Priscilla Stone

Really?

Atticus Skinner

Interrogations and Cats

A little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men

Kristy Bridges

To be rid of the Monsters under our beds

I am concerned, Ma’am

Et tu, Atticus? [Dies]

If you forge the right paperwork, it’s not squatting

Please cancel my subscription to your issues

What a nice day to commit mass murder!!

Oh God, _a plot twist_

Upon a Child that Died

Martha Coakley

I was expecting a battle of the wits, but you appear to be unarmed

What the actual Fuck did you just do.

Nokk Cyning

Hmm.

Blood isn’t a good color on you, Sir

Oops, Sorry.

Way to go, Dumbass

Can I get a waffle? Can I PLEASE get a waffle?

Ironically alive

[Insert John Mulaney Quote Here]

Error 404: Soul Not Found

What we have here is a failure to communicate

So Shines a Good Deed in a Weary World

We are the music-makers, and we are the dreamers of dreams

I’m not riding the bandwagon; I‘m driving this bus straight to hell.

The Fine Art of Bullshit

Houston I have so many problems.

I’m sorry, did I roll my eyes out loud?

*Pink Panther Theme*

Is S an Odd Number?

On Getting Decapitated…

Hey Google..? What the Fuck.

What.

What. (X2)

Interesting Concept, but Terrible Execution.

The Dead don’t talk, but God can they Sing.

Does this count as an OSHA Violation?

God may judge you, but His sins outnumber your own

If you can’t blow them away with your brilliance, baffle them with your bullshit

You think  _ you _ want me to shut up?? I have to listen to myself even when I’m not talking

A Folding Chair and a Rapier are both weapons, but for Different Battles and Different Times

Oh God Oh Fuck That Was Not What I Intended. Shit.

Uhhhhh....Oops?

We’re not a Couple; we’re siblings.

I was literally just craving ice cream…

I’m here, I’m Queer, I’m filled with Existential Fear

The US Postal Service Fails Again

Cheese is a Common Noun!

Discount Royalty Titles, 70% off!

Torture! Fun

As Unacceptable as it sounds? It’s Not My Fault.

:):):):):):):):):):):)

Thanks Obama

He’s okay, he’s just dead.

A series of uneducated guesses

You ever seen those commercials where people screw up the simplest of tasks in the most idiotic fashion ever? Yeah...that’s basically what happened here.

Fuck It Up, Goodwin

A Guide to Giving Up

Several Bad Puns Later…

I taught the four-year-old to say “Tax Benefits” and now she won’t  _ stop _

You have the Moral Backbone of a Chocolate Éclair

I thought you were Bae. Turns out you’re just Fam

This is why mom doesn’t FUCKING love you!!

I don’t like this.

That was a lot easier than expected

Terrifying. I love it.

Item: Doubt.

Time For A Bit Of Improvisation

T is for Trauma

Top 10 Anime Betrayals

God won’t forgive me for my Sins

So Maybe I’m Not Okay.

Let’s NOT Wipe Out The Monster Kind

Doritos and Death: A How-To

John Mulaney Can Kiss My Sparkly Ass.

Wednesdays are the  _ Worst. _

Does Anyone know what the hell just happened?

This Chapter is Sponsored by [corny emotion from relevant character]


	9. Character Histories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How the characters get to be how they are at the start of the story.

_Susu:_

On how they and Dita got the Royal monster family's attention and obtained the injury that rendered them selectively mute:

_Goodwin:_

On how he became the top scientist for Runic Magic and one of the Royal family's inner circle:

_Aldun:_

On how he came to ascend to the throne, and how he dealt with the issues discussed in the Monster History and Wars sections of the World History:

_Matron:_

On How she came to develop the Home, her hatred of monsters, and her relationship with the Skinner twins:

_Skinner Twins:_

On how they survived the early years of their childhood and teenage years, and how they rose to rule a Mafia and control a significant section of the black market.


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